I am still lonely. I don't know when I can recovery my heart. And, when can i find a new boyfriend. Today I decide to teach myself computational chemistry. I will do it every week. If I was immersed in knowledge, would I forget my ex-boyfriend. If I became better, would I be love by others. I commence making my DIY wallet. Originally, I wanted to make it and gave it to my ex-boyfriend, but He became my ex-boyfriend.

Today is Mid Autumn Festival and The Teacher's Festival. I still can't forget Banma. Though, I know we can't make up with him. I must forget him and forgive myself. But it is difficult to me. I think I can find a better boyfriend. more handsome, smarter, and loveing me more. Banma is my first love. Although, he abandon me, I also gain much happiness from our relationship. I will remember this experience. But, I must forgive myself.

I always fantasize if my IQ is higher. I cound understand everything on the book after reading it only once. But actually, Ican't do it. For example, It took me a lot of time to learn <Structuural Chemistry>,<Physics Chemistry>and so on. I must read the book many times. Fortunately, I can understand it at last. I am so stupid that I doubt whether I can become a chemist. Or I should give up learning Chemistry. Now I am studying for a master's degree in chemistry. If it too hard to me. I will give up it. But I will try my best.

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